The Overwhelming Love of God

Ephesians 3:17b-19
 “I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge – that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.”

A few weeks back, I was in church and listening to Pastor Joel preach about our witness in this world. My heart was stirred, and I felt many emotions come up, a conviction. Does God call me to speak out and testify of His power in my story? Is it right for me to keep it to myself? 

Most of you know my story, or I should say the story of my husband Tony. Many of you know a lot of details about it but might not know what I felt compelled to share today. This month has been the 5th anniversary of the murder of my Tony. Before I proceed, please hear my heart, I decided to obey God’s prompting only for the glory of His name, to reveal His amazing love for me, for us, for all of you reading and hearing it. It’s not about the events surrounding it. My hope and prayer are that it will bring hope and confidence in our living God, who cares and who loves us so deeply.

On September 3, 2019, I had left for town with some relatives who were visiting. As we were enjoying some lunch, one of them carefully conveyed to me that he had had a dream the previous night. He shared with me that in the first part of the dream, he was walking out of a meeting room, as darkness was falling. Suddenly he felt gripped by his leg, and he was able to grab hold of it. As he held it out into the light of a lamp, he saw this creature shriveling up.
Next, he saw a vision of Tony and became overwhelmed with sorrow. He could feel that Tony was going through something very difficult, so much so that he started crying because of its intensity. Immediately following this was the overwhelming, all-encompassing amazing love of God falling over him. So deep, so penetrating as this person had never experienced before. He woke up, still reeling from the struggle and pain of Tony and got up, out of bed, knelt on the floor and started praying for him.
He told me that he believed God wanted him to tell Tony how much and overwhelming God loved him and valued him. I had never heard anything like this before, a dream like this, so strange and foreign, but I also knew that I was not going to hinder such a message if it was from the Lord. I have to add that this person was not particularly close to Tony, so it was a strange revelation to say the least.

As we drove off after lunch, not a half hour later, I received the horrific call that Tony had been shot and that he was gone from us. I cannot describe that moment, though what happened next will also be forever in my memory. Those with me in the car and I, immediately understood that the dream we had just talked about was not a message for Tony, but to us, his family, to know without a doubt that though evil had taken his earthly life, the Lord was right there with him, carrying him, loving him into his heavenly home. Evil did not win that day, God’s love won out, His power, His grace. And we just had to lift our hearts in praise to God, right that moment in the car, however absurd it seemed at such a dark moment.

Not only our family, but all of us as God’s dearly loved children have a story to share with those who have lost hope, whose lives are so full of pain and difficulties. The message that the Lord is behind us, that He goes before us, walks beside us and will go through the fire with us. Though we do not understand many things, His love for us is real, so real, and never leaves us for one moment. He does not leave us in the dark. He is there with us whether it is in terminal illness, through accidents, financial hardship, rejection, or through the pain and turmoil of guilt and shame - He loves us, will restore us and cover us with His grace. Even when an evil deed leads to physical death, none of it can separate us from God’s love in Christ Jesus. It is this Love that helps us see that we must bring the hope to those who are controlled by this evil but so desperately need the light of the gospel message.

Let’s share this hope we have with a world in which so many have lost hope and direction. And let’s encourage one another in love and walk in this amazing and overwhelming love of our Lord, shown us by His grace.

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