Building Others Up
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
This has been a go-to scripture for me for about 15 years. I value its directness and timelessness. I appreciate that the meaning is clear - regardless of the century we are living in. Don’t let any unwholesome talk come out of my mouth.Check. For some, it’s not a hard thing to avoid letting unwholesome talk come out of their mouth. But the rest of the passage. That’s where I believe the gears downshift.
Have you ever been at Starbucks and made note of the verbal exchanges taking place? The way the barista engages in conversation with the customer ~ the customer who is clearly having a horribly bad start to their day? Often, I will watch in awe of the barista who is calm, composed, and makes an intentional effort to offer the customer a kind word and a great cup of coffee. It’s almost as if the barista is on a mission to make that customer feel better about where their day might be headed. I know, it’s just coffee. But there are more than two people involved in that exchange of words and expressions. There are the other customers waiting in line, the barista’s coworkers, and the customers sitting in the café. All of them are hearing some or all that exchange. What are they walking away with from that encounter?
One of my favorite quotes is from Brennan Manning, “In every encounter we either give life or we drain it; there is no neutral exchange.” No neutral exchange. Our words mean things ~ they either soothe or they harm. As Christians, how are the words we use affecting those across the counter from us? Or across the dinner table?
What if our goal was to attempt to make every person we encounter feel better when they leave whatever exchange we have with them? What if when they left our presence, they felt valued and appreciated? What if they saw Christ in that encounter? We as Christians have an opportunity to be the Light of Christ in what seem to be very small encounters.
But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.